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EBANMAN LIFESTYLE / FAMILY

THE MESSY TIDBITS OF LIFE

THE MESSY TIDBITS OF LIFE

The Messy Tidbits of Life by Carlton Sapp  In the beginning I decided I would forge my own path. What a crock of shit that is…though it does sound good. I never “decided” I would do anything.  I simply went about my life, doing what I thought was best for me…trying not to allow other’s perceptions impact my decisions. Now that I am married with two kid, even I have to admit, my life does look like the poster child for the evolution of the gay agenda. Honestly though…it just happened. OK, it didn’t “just” happen…but it feels like it did. I should at least explain myself. Have you seen the picture of me and my family? I have the most annoying luck.  I have a great family…a husband who thinks the sun rises and sets on me and 2 amazing, gorgeous boys. For that, I deal with people constantly looking at me giving me their nods and smiles of approval.  Like really, I am at Costco trying to get juice and snacks for my son’s pre-K class (paying tuition is no longer enough)…I am not there to make a political statement. My friends and family are worse.  One asked if he could come to our house to watch how we live as if we are a family in a snow globe!  Shake us up and we’ll run through the morning routine. Shake again and you can see us cooking dinner. Gay people are more bold. They will say things like “oh you have everything I want” or “I hope to have a husband and kids just like you someday”.  Every time I hear that sort of thing, I imagine myself giving them an open-hand slap across the mouth in this the grass isn’t always greener sort of way. But I do recognize that I am fortunate.  I thank God for it. I just don’t care to be told that when I am knee deep in figuring out school schedules or paying the Nanny. Sometimes I wanna tell them about all the messy tidbits behind my “picture-perfect” life.  Like how I am no longer able to take a shit without an audience or how long it took my boys to learn how to wipe their own asses. Should I share the story of the day I walked into the bathroom and found that one of my children wiped shit all across my white subway tile. How about my self-diagnosed PTSD linked to when my child threw up across the dining room table forcing me to sell it as my cure. Better yet, let me state how I wake at 5:30am and am often, not tired…but exhausted by 9pm and have reached the point in life where when having to decide between sleep and sex…sleep wins all the time! You see, for as good as my life is, it is hard, messy and very rarely glamorous. I am not complaining…but be careful what you wish for. Oh and don’t read parenting books…they will make you feel like crap! Carlton Sapp]]>

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